I thought Joe and I were doing great in my last post and we broke up within a matter of days after I posted it.
I'm not really over it, it kind of was out of the blue for me. Here's part of a conversation I copied that my best friend and I had last night:
Me: lol but eh i feel a little conflicted by thinking that because i know i shouldnt have to wait around but like i dont know fuck it or something because fairy tales aren't always as pretty in real life. and i dont have much else to do. so i'll just hide my false hope under the rug or something.
Megan: well of course you aren't going to have things figured out right away, and you will feel conflicted. I think it's normal. and yeah you will still have that hope that maybe things will be different, but in the end sometimes they aren't different. and then you will have waited for something that meant nothing. but really you didn't lose anything by it. it was just a season of your life, and remember "this too shall pass"
Me: yeah so its okay to have that silly little hope deep down inside me? lol
Megan: uh yes. lol
Megan: i've been holding on to a lyric for a while, "I'm still carrying a little hope, that maybe, things could be different now. Is that so wrong?"
Me: who is it?
Megan: jimmy eat world.
Me: i see. yeah. i mean i cant get around it. but i feel bad about it. eh and maybe thats love. like real love and maybe real love isnt always your soul mate or who you are supposed to be with or whatever.
Megan: real love doesn't have to be with your soul mate. atleast I don't think it does.
Megan: I think real love is for anyone.
Me: well i always want to think love last forever and that makes me think you can only have one but maybe you can love more than one forever and if i cant have him the way i want him i love him regaurdless no matter how much it hurts
What's meant to be will find it's way.
... whatever that is.
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